So what's the story of The Ring?
Firstly if you've read OUR STORY you'll know that Simeon's proposal wasn't something out of the blue. We had discussed marriage before we'd even allowed ourselves to be considered a 'couple' haha. We like to open our minds to each other... wander among each others thoughts.. marvel and wonder at the way each other's mind works... SO.. as a result of this - Simeon talked to me about his thoughts about a ring before he created it. I know for some women this wouldn't work - they like the surprise element.. I can understand that and actually I didn't ever see the ring ITSELF until it was offered to me as a sign of Simeon's promise to be joined in 'Holy Matrimony' etc etc ;o) But I did KNOW he was making the ring and I knew (and LOVED) the reasons behind it.
Since early on in our relationship there's been a kind of enduring THEME of salvage, restoration, making beauty from ashes. It's something that's always captured both of us seperately so in our coming together it wove it's way out of our individual identities and into our identity as a 'couple'. There are so many little ways this expresses itself. Often Simeon's romantic gestures (we call them 'sneakins' haha) are a display of this - This desire that we both have to recognise the beauty in things others have disguarded.
In me it's often meant WANTING the uglier toys... the tattier books.. and I don't mean just settling for them, there is something within me that really geuinely LONGS for the broken things.. I like them BEST because there's such reward in SEEKING the not-so-obvious beauty I think.
This is a donkey I found at a carbootsale when I was a teenager.. he was muddy and sad sitting next to a load of much happier cleaner toys. I paid 10p for him. I made him my friend. I love him. DEARLY
One of the first (and most touching) gifts I ever received from Simeon was this necklace... you've probably seen me wear it because it's one of my favourite pieces of jewellery.
Along with this necklace came a letter (we were living hundreds of miles apart at the time) I shall allow you a sneaky peak at an excerpt but shhh don't tell everyone how romantic and beautiful Simeon is.. he's got a rep to protect you know ;oP
A few months later came a flower :o) that wouldn't need water, that wouldn't die, that was created out of random 'used goods'
I see SO clearly in all of this a beautiful picture of the way God redeems/choses the broken but I can only assume that HE placed this thing in us to show it for His glory because our desire to do it was before we really understood it of Him (much as I'd like to claim some superior holiness and pretend otherwise haha) It does help me to understand (on a WAY tinier scale) why God would seek out the broken and call them treasure though.
Of course this also mirrors (for me) the way that God has used Simeon to redeem my experience of love and marriage. That a man who'd saved himself entirely for his perfect bride - would shun the 'prettier', less 'damaged' women and choose a battered, little, divorced, weirdo who was 'used goods' (not MY words.. but that was said about me to Simeon in an attempt to point out the weirdness of his choice) Simeon didn't choose me because he wanted to be charitable, he wasn't making a sacrifice in his eyes because to him I was the thing he saw as TREASURE.. I was the beauty he most desired. Simeon sees in me a beauty beyond anything I can understand, deeper than anything I could believe if I didn't SEE it so glaringly in his eyes whenever he looks at me. I'm not saying for a moment that I don't think I 'deserve' Simeon.. and I'm not marrying him because I think he's the only man who'd ever want me or ANYTHING like that haha. Maybe it doesn't make sense to you but I know what I mean :oP
Ah it's all such overwhelming stuff eh? anyway back to the story (I just think the significance will be lost without the detail sorry haha)
So understanding that we have a theme of re-using stuff others had cast off and that we find the broken things beautiful. Combine that with the recent burden on our hearts this past year about justice, ethical trading, eco friendly lifestyles. Add on top of THAT the dislike we both have of the monstrous WEDDING INDUSTRY and the MILLIONS poured into feeding it every year while others can't even afford to EAT! aaaaand add to that the fact that we really don't have much money - and with all that in mind it would simply not have made sense for us to go and blow thousands on a traditional diamond ring.
disclaimer: many of my friends have traditional diamond rings.. they're beautiful and they suit who they are.. I'm NOT judging OR turning my nose up.. I'm just being true to ME
So Simeon embarked on learning the craft of ringmaking. He had in his shed some old salvaged piano keys from a thrown out Sunday School piano and decided that give our enduring affinity with all things TREE related.. Ebony was the PERFECT material from which to make an engagement ring.
I won't go into the details of HOW he made the ring (though he does intend to.. watch this space) but an interesting detail is that unlike most Brides-to-Be I actually have TWO engagement rings. While hand crafting the original Simeon noticed a weakness in the wood and guessing that it might break.. he created a backup (he could just have given me the backup but he liked the thinner style)
I have since 'injured' the thinner ring and switched to the thicker one but the plan for the ring was never that it last for life. I will wear this ring until the day that Simeon and I make our vows in front of the people we love and he replaces this ring with a WEDDING RING (a WHOLE other story haha) I will probably at this point switch the engagement ring onto a necklace.
So... there you have it. THAT is why this particular engagement ring is SO DEEPLY personal and appropriate for me :o) I wear with inexplicable pride and honour and the knowledge that I am marrying a man who really 'gets' me.
*happy*
xxx
